Rape. Phew, there, I said it. The “R” word everyone is afraid of. Now that we’ve gotten over the initial shock of the word, let’s talk about the hottest new movie about to come out on the silver screen and what it has to do with that dreaded big “R”.
You may have seen this trailer on your facebook feed or twitter timeline in the past few days-
Oooh, who doesn’t love some sexual clips of two attractive people grabbing one another accompanied by a slowed down sensual version of Beyoncé’s ”Crazy In Love”? This trailer screams, "Hello pubescent teenagers! Follow your hormones and see what love and sex is all about!" This is what scares me the most.
Let me preference this by saying I have not read, nor will I ever read, 50 Shades of Grey in its entirety. I have, however, read passages from this book as well as summaries and reviews. (Let’s be truthful with one another, this is not an earth shattering piece of literature, this is glorified Twilight fanfiction. You don’t have to read this book to understand it’s general “plot”.) As you are most likely aware, this book focuses on the practice of BDSM (Bondage, Domination, Sadism and Masochism), or at least that’s what the book tries to tell you, when in reality, this is a book that romanticizes rape. On top of it all, it is being made into a feature film! I can’t wait to not spend $7.50 to
see endure this movie.
As Salt-N-Peppa would say, let’s talk about sex. Everyone enjoys different things in the bedroom. This is all good and fine, and completely your own business, until it becomes non consensual. Let’s be clear, non consensual sex is rape. There is no other way around it. There are no “grey areas” (how ironic).
Okay, one more time, for those who are still struggling-
NO CONSENT = RAPE
Got it? Good.
50 Shades of Grey is not, and I repeat, IS NOT A STORY OF CONSENSUAL SEX.
Christian Grey, our main lead male character, has Anastasia, our lead female, sign a contract stating he can use her for his own sexual gratification at any time and by any means. Uh, red flag, anyone? Consenting once does not mean you consent forever. Whether you are in a relationship or… ‘under contractual agreement’, you don’t have to give up your body to anyone. It is not consensual sex unless both parties can willingly make a decision every time, free of any influence, whether it be pressure or intoxication.
There is also a scene in the book in which Anastasia wants to back out, she wants to stop, but Christian won’t let her and continues on. That is the most literal form of rape there is, and yet we don’t recognize it as such. I haven’t even began to touch on the passage in which Christian tells Ana he is going to be keeping tabs on her. Don’t even get me started on the famous “tampon scene” (you’ll have to google that one). Christian is constantly controlling Ana, physically and socially, it is an abusive and power based relationship that is portrayed as sexy, fun, and passionate by E.L. James. Way to go, girl. You have officially contributed to the ever growing problem that is rape culture. Girl power!
This book is normalizing abuse and making it seem like it is “okay” to have no control over your own body. To any woman is in a toxic, abusive, or controlling relationship please listen to me- get out and get help. There is no fairy tale ending in this situation. There is no “he’ll change”, get out before it’s too late. Books and movies like this emulate false realities, please heed my warning and get out of there, and if you are in danger, get help immediately.
Overall, the book encourages the concept of misogyny. It encourages the idea that every young woman has a secret desire to be “dominated” or controlled by a male counterpart. This feeds a flame that people have been trying to put out for years, and I’m sure this movie will pour gasoline all over it! Overall, the book discredits the experiences that victims of rape have had to live with, it’s a complete disrespect. Don’t get me wrong, I am not against women reading erotica if that’s what they want to do. Be comfortable with your own sexuality! Go for it! Empower yourself! Just understand that Christian Grey isn’t “erotic”, he is a rapist.
I hate giving this book more attention than necessary, I really do, but no one can stop this movie from happening, it’s too late for that. What we can do is use this book and movie as a conversation starter. Talk to your friends, parents, classmates, peers, children, professors, and everyone else about the issue of rape. It has to become less of a taboo, and soon. It’s a growing issue and is only going to continue to grow if we keep accepting it just because no one wants to talk about it. Please- start talking. Oh, and please, do not go see the movie 50 Shades of
Bey and Jay
Les hommes pensent que les féministes détestent le sexe,
Mais c’est une activité très stimulante et naturelle que les femmes adorent.